Now that you have chosen your lifetime-partner, how do you choose the team of wedding professionals who will make your wedding perfect?

A good rule of thumb is to like the personalities of the professionals you select. Ask, "Is it obvious that this wedding professional loves his work?" Choose those who are excited about making your wedding dreams come true. Select professionals who are not only intuitive and sensitive, but who also have the ability to "pull-off" your special requests. How will you know? Ask how long they have been in business. Find out how much of their business has been weddings. A long-time professional will have developed good working relationships with other wedding professionals. After you have found the professional you really trust, you should network with them and get referrals for other wedding professionals.

It is great fun to have a wedding celebration filled with professionals who know each other and work well together. Things seem to flow better that way. Often, the professionals even take care of each other on the job! They understand what needs to happen and they make it happen. Whether they have worked together before or not, true professionals will work together to become your "winning team." How do you start making your choices? In the area of video and photography, you should ask to see the vendorÕs work in film. Choose the technicians who catch the essence of the event in their film. As you look at their work, you will know. Ask yourself, "Is this just a camera job anyone could have done or does this work capture the spirit and feelings of the people?"

For caterers and cakes, unless you have been to an event where you were able to taste and experience the food in person, a sampling is highly recommended. Knowing how a caterer displays their "food creations" is also very important. Ask if they have photos of buffet style presentations as well as individual plate displays. You will be looking for the food to be attractively presented as well as tasty. Ask how they staff their servers and how many servers they anticipate needing for your event's format and size? Do they do ice sculpture? Do they work with the florist to arrange the table displays or do they have their own specialty items (mirrors, pedestals, etc.)? Caterers will often have many of their own display items AND work with a florist. Ask who that florist is. This is how you get on your way to networking with the professionals. From a little conversation, you can gather a "winning team" that works well together for your wedding. The end result will be a good rapport with the workers and therefore, the wedding.

You may enjoy seeking your wedding professionals one by one, or you can work with coordinators. Most people think of coordinators as a luxury. Perhaps so, but luxury is not always dependent on budget! Many coordinators are very affordable and will save you time, money, and stress! Some are higher in price but will still save you time and worry; allowing you to enjoy the planning of your wedding day.

Ask yourself these questions

Will the end result of my hiring a coordinator be:

A more enjoyable experience for my guests and me?

A more elegant and polished event?

More time to enjoy my fiancŽ and family throughout the planning process?

Usually, "yes" is the answer to these questions. Let us take a moment and learn about coordinators. Wedding consultants, wedding coordinators and wedding directors are ÒmagicalÓ people who have been through more weddings than any nonprofessional individual could ever dream of. A wedding consultant helps you with advice toward the shaping of your wedding and may or may not physically orchestrate all of the details for you. As with a consulting firm, you may pay a consulting fee for the knowledge of the person and the leads they give you, but they may not hire the work for you. That may be left to you. In some ways it is wonderful to pay an hourly consulting fee (anywhere from $40 to $200 an hour) and then from your list of vendors and ideas you may go and do the legwork yourself. There are numerous creative wedding styles and ideas to be found in an hour or two with a knowledgeable person. The consultant will most often make themselves available to direct your actual wedding day as well.

A wedding coordinator usually does consulting as well as hiring for the bride. Coordinators sometimes charge an hourly rate for the initial planning session, then working with the established budget, they will hire the professionals needed and take a percentage of the wedding expenses as their salary. They will also do the actual event directing.

Wedding directors are often on staff at churches or at popular wedding locations. These directors are responsible for the smoothness of the ceremony, but not the hiring of vendors for the event. They may have many suggestions as to other wedding professionals used most often at their location. The "location wedding director" will come with a small fee from the church or location who staffs them. In churches these directors most often are the mediator for the minister, fielding frequently asked questions and handling church or location policies. Usually church directors only oversee the activities at that location. Some, however, may be "available for hire" to finish the coordinating at the reception.

In all cases, it is important that the person you choose to assist with, or manage your wedding be experienced or they will not be of beneficial service to your "wedding team" or wedding activities. At times you will find the above job titles, consultant, coordinator and director interchanged. You have heard the old adage: "I don't do windows." When hiring a wedding consultant, coordinator or director it is important to clearly understand what footwork, if any, the individual plans to do for you.

Because there are so many intricate details to planning a wedding celebration, it is important to understand who is doing what. For example, some coordinators will address invitations, others will not. Some coordinators will take charge of the bride's wedding gown and clothing details, others will not.

Finally, in any category of wedding consulting, most all will tailor their job description to fit the needs of the bride, whether it be coordinating the flow of wedding day activities or the preparatory hiring and organization. Again, be sure you know who is doing what. Having a wedding director at the wedding rehearsal can be a wonderful thing. She can answer questions and prepare the wedding party mentally for the big event. Once the choreography is over, the officiant runs the wedding in content, however, the director will have relayed any information to the officiant about musical solos to be inserted into the format. All these ideas will be worked out and approved by the officiant prior to the rehearsal so that there is harmony in the production process. Knowing that the content of the service is managed by the officiant, a wedding director can make suggestions, but the final approval is the officiant's choice. Most are very happy to see family and friends participate in readings and special music. Other officiants might streamline events. A good wedding director understands the needs of the service and can guide the bride with appropriate suggestions to present to the officiant. Respect and preference should always be given to the official or minister performing the ceremony. This is their area of expertise and the most important part of the day. Without the official, there would be no wedding, and most are happy to make it special for you. On the actual wedding day, a wedding director acts as a Òguardian angelÒ of the plan. She keeps everything going without getting in the way of the other wedding workers. She has the total schedule for the day and she knows that everyone has their tuxedos or who has picked them up. She trains the ushers to pull the aisle cloth runner, manages the lighting of the candelabras, oversees the ushers as they seat the guests, helps in dressing needs and sees to it that the wedding party arrives on time with rings and all the needed things. She basically knows who is doing what and follows through with the details. Many wedding directors carry emergency kits with things like tape, safety-pins, etc. They properly seat the mothers and initiate the processional. After the wedding recessional, the director sees the ushers back into the church to escort the parents and grandparents out. She will continue to manage the wedding party to keep them organized as the photographer does their job. She manages the receiving line, limousine entrances and exits and, at the reception, she coordinates many other activities. Finding an experienced coordinator is so important. One cannot over stress the use of referrals. The true stories below are captured from actual events. They are meant to show you the benefits of hiring a knowledgeable coordinator. You will see clearly why you don't just use the phone book to find an experienced wedding consultant, coordinator or director! Using the phone book in conjunction with consulting other wedding professionals for their recommendations is crucial to setting up a "winning team" for your celebration. There are certain things that tell other wedding professionals which coordinators have the experience. Can you find what is wrong in this example? At a wedding reception it is time to cut the cake. Guests are dancing and the party is fun. The wedding director goes to the bride and groom and says ÒIt's time to cut the cake." She brings them to the cake table and they are ready...

Not so fast. That is the inexperienced wedding director. The experience wedding director knows it's time, but says to the bride and groom, ÒWe will cut the cake in 5 minutes.Ó She finds the caterer, the videographer, the photographer, and plans an announcement with the band. Finally she returns to the bride and groom and says, "We are ready to cut the cake." The band announces the activity and all converge at the cake to catch the action. Now that is real directing. Directing that has facilitated the other professionals. Team work if you will. Other wedding professionals know who is doing the job right because all of the jobs intertwine. We have said, "Interview all the professionals you hire." I once met a wedding director in the field who told me that she had just gone through her daughter's wedding six months ago and decided she could make a living directing weddings. Up went her "shingle" for business and there she was directing her first wedding with no training or internship from a seasoned professional. Knowing where directors have trained, how many weddings or parties they have coordinated, and where these events were located is very important. With this information, you have a way of checking the reputation of the director. For example, if you did not get the name of the director from the referral system, and this person reports having worked frequently with a specific hotel, call that hotel and verify their association with this particular director. Call the trainer under whom she apprenticed. Remember, the best coordinator is one who frees all of the other professionals at the event to do their jobs. She will not only free the other professionals, she will also assist and understand the needs of the other professionals. This takes time in the field.

Final Hints With or without a wedding coordinator, job assignments among the wedding party and family is of the utmost importance. A wedding coordinator will have a list of the participating wedding party and family and will manage the job assignments and activities of the group.

The Bride and Groom need to be clearly informed from the start as to what the wedding coordinator will and will not do. Finding good vendors and allowing them to do their jobs is the real key to the success of your wedding day celebration. A good wedding director can be worth her weight in gold if she facilitates the other professionals. Remember, go for the experienced personnel so you and the family can relax! Melody Long Anglin is a Concert Harpist, Vocalist, Workshop Coordinator and Private Instructor. She is also available for wedding consultation and coordinating. For more information call or or email Anglinhous .